


A Plant Duck Walks Into a Bar

by Lesbian_Ducklord



Category: Darkwing Duck (Cartoon 1991)
Genre: Cussing, M/M, Steelbeak owns a club/bar, a bit more suggestive, i've fallen into rarepair hell, mentions of drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-30 05:31:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20092066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lesbian_Ducklord/pseuds/Lesbian_Ducklord
Summary: Both a certain rooster and plant duck are having a rough night and are looking for a distraction. What happens when they both walk into the same bar?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Rare Pair Hell has claimed me once again. Take this while I take my L

He was not having a good night. The rooster had spent most of the past 24 hours with Ammonia Pines. Half of which was her hitting on him, the other half was her beating his ass. He was getting really sick of being stuck on missions with her, but it’s not like he just go tell High Command “Ey I don’t wanna work with this person anymore”. This wasn’t high school, this was F.O.W.L, one of the most dangerous, if not the most dangerous, organizations in the world. If he complained, he could wind up with a fate worse than his predecessor. God he needed a drink.

The tall slender rooster finally reached his destination and pulled up to the valet. Getting out of his convertible, he got in the face of the much shorter valet driver. “One mark, and yer gonna find yourself dead in da ground” he sternly warned the employee as he dropped the keys into his hand. He walked around the side of the building into an alleyway. Approaching a hidden door, he knocked. An eye hole slide opened up as a result.

“Password?” a voice from inside asked, the rooster looked annoyed before responding, “It’s me ya dumb ass.” Upon him saying this, the door was immediately unlocked and opened. Before him stood a nervous male duck in a suit. “S-sir! I apologize, I was unaware you’d be coming by toni-” interrupting his bouncer, Steelbeak walked past him inside “Yeah yeah, cut the crap.”

Walking into the elevator and giving the operator, a goose, a look and nodding. The goose nodded back and pressed the down button. When the elevator doors reopened, Steelbeak was greeted by his favorite sight on a night like this. His Villains and F.O.W.L Agents bar and club. The redwood and brown leather interior brought him a sense of calm. Making his way over to the bar, he took a seat on one of the stools. “Ey Marty! The usual!” he called to his bartender before turning around to look over the suspects in his club tonight. A couple usuals including Black Heron, and a few unfamiliar faces who were mingling with those he knew. He turned back around when he heard the drink being slid over to him. Grabbing it and immediately taking a sip.

The penguin behind the counter, Marty, looked up from the glass he was cleaning to talk to his boss. “Rough night?’’ Steelbeak chortled, “You have no idea.” Marty smirked, “Let me guess, you got put on another mission with Ammonia?” Steelbeak sighed before nodding and taking another sip from his cocktail. Marty laughed at the response.

“Sounds to me like you need yourself a good drink, check, and a dame or two.” Steelbeak contemplated it for a moment. “Yer probably right. I just need a good distraction from the approaching doom that is my next mission with her tomorrow.” Steelbeak took another look at tonight’s menu. He was pretty bored and uninterested with the selection until he looked down to the other end of the bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little fun note, the cocktail Steelbeak orders is called a Crow


	2. Chapter 2

One Hour Earlier,

He was not having a good night. Between the fight with Darkwing Duck and dealing with Negaduck’s wrath, Bushroot just wanted a break. He’d only tried drinking once since his mutation and had found that while he could somewhat taste the drink’s flavor, it wouldn’t give him any kind of buzz. Not that he minded however. Considering he didn’t really like getting drunk before he mutated.

He had heard about this bar from a few other villains and figured it was something he might as well check out. What he hadn’t been expecting was that after he delivered the pass-code and the door opened, he was met with an absolutely terrified duck bouncer. “B-B-Bushroot! I am so so terribly sorry if I had known it was a member of the Fearsome Five on the other side of the door I-I wouldn’t have-” the plant duck watched in shock as the bouncer continued to stammer.

Walking inside to the elevator, he was met with the same scared reaction from the elevator operator. Was he really considered a threat by these people? Someone to fear the same way Negaduck was feared? He had to admit it felt nice to be on the other side of the terrified exchange for once. Walking out of the elevator and into the club, he felt a bit better than he had on his way over. He took a seat at the bar as the bartender approached him.

“Welcome Mr. Bushroot. What can I get you?” Reginald was a little shocked at first that the bartender knew who he was, but figured it would be stupid to ask how he knew his name. “Uh I’ll just have a Summer Garden.” The bartender nodded and proceeded to make his drink. “So,” the bartender began, “I never see you in here. What brings you here?” Bushroot smiled softly. Someone actually wanted to talk to him. He began to tell the penguin about his hell of a night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah so when I came up with this idea I had an actual pass-code for the club. I totally forgot what it was supposed to be while writing though so here we are.


	3. Chapter 3

“Who’s that?’’ the bartender looked up from what he was doing. “Who?” Steelbeak didn’t tear his gaze away from the end of the bar “The flower over there.” Marty followed the gaze of his boss. “Oh. That’s Fearsome Five member Bushroot. Having a real rough night that one.” Steelbeak licked his beak before asking the bartender another question. “Single or-” the bartender cut him off with his answer “Single as far as I know. It doesn’t seem Negaduck has laid claim to this-” the rooster was walking over to the plant duck before the penguin could finish his sentence. The bartender sighed, “Why do I even bother?’’

Reginald was enjoying his drink when a large hand was placed on the bar next to him. Upon looking to his left, he was met with the large chest of the one and only, Agent Steelbeak. “Hey babe~” the rooster said suavely. Bushroot was shocked and confused. He double checked no one else was around him. Nope, he was talking to him. But Steelbeak was straight wasn’t he? Oh no. 

“How ya doin tonight?” the rooster asked, “Not that great considering you clearly think I’m a female.’’ the deep voiced answer Steelbeak got threw him majorly off guard and caused him to don a shocked face. He had most certainly thought the plant duck was a female. Between what he had heard from his nights with Negaduck and the plant duck’s feminine build, he had thought for sure he was correct. No matter, he could still work with this. Cause, contrary to popular belief, he was also into males. 

“Ok, maybe I did think that, but I acknowledge that I was wrong and ask ya again. How ya doin tonight?” that stupid attractive smirk was back on his face. Reginald blushed, he had expected the rooster to move on after realizing he was a male, and yet here he still was. “Um, c-could be going better if I’m honest.” The rooster noticed the slight red on the duck’s face and smirked before leaning forward and lifting the duck’s face up closer to his. Reginald could feel the other bird’s warm whiskey scented breath on his face and was redder than a beet. 

Steelbeak chuckled before seductively whispering to the plant duck, “How about I make it all better?” Upon realizing what the rooster most likely meant, Bushroot nervously laughed, pushing the suave F.O.W.L agent back a little. “Look, I uh, don’t really have the same body as-” Steelbeak put his finger over the plant duck’s beak, stopping him mid sentence. “You’re part plant part duck correct?” Bushroot nodded. “Well I’m sure I’ll figure it out. If you’re willing to let me.” Bushroot frantically nodded his consent. Steelbeak’s smirk returned as he stood up, taking Bushroot’s leafy hand into his large one. Leading the plant duck to his private area of the club.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it. I am not taking this any farther. Well, not this fic at least. This side ship however
> 
> Also hi Steelbeak may be a villain but in this household we do consent no matter what


End file.
